Relationships Among Women and Competition: Is Female Friendship Real?

In this film, the main character, Andy, consistently attempts to befriend her colleague, Emily. However, Emily maintains a negative attitude towards Andy throughout the entire film. Despite Andy's efforts to assist her, Emily harbors an unexplained animosity. By the film's conclusion, Miranda, the magazine's editor-in-chief where both women work, advises Andy to "step over" Emily to achieve success. This scene always puzzled me. Must women always harbor animosity and constantly compete both in the workplace and in their personal lives?

There exists a stereotype that female friendship is non-existent, suggesting that women only judge and argue with each other. They quarrel at work, compete over men, fail to support each other, and step over others to achieve their goals. So, is female friendship a myth or reality? Why do women argue?

There could be numerous reasons for disagreements. Perhaps you simply dislike someone, or maybe there was a conflict of interest. It might even be just a bad day. However, it is worth noting that women argue with women just as men argue with men. There is no gender-based distinction in the frequency or with whom arguments occur. In fact, women have fewer reasons for conflicts compared to men. Psychologically, we are more accommodating and less inclined to disputes, preferring to exist in non-hostile environments. Anthropologically, a woman's role has been to support family members and ensure a safe home. In the 21st century, this translates into a desire to create comfort in any environment, such as at work. So, where do the myths about female competition originate?

These myths arise from the society around us. Our upbringing encourages us to judge and immediately disdain other women. However, this hasn't always been the case.

The anthropological role of men drives them to compete for resources and sexual partners. When women claimed emancipation and equality with men in the early 20th century, society began treating them as equals. Consequently, traditionally male qualities, including competition, were attributed to women. Women came to be seen as ambitious, detached from family, and willing to push boundaries for career success or the man of their dreams. This led to a new wave of social rejection because historically, women were expected to care for the family.

Interestingly, we adopt this stance ourselves. Many of my friends either embrace the role of "traditional moms" or "career women." However, this isn't entirely accurate. Women are not like men. The competition imposed by society is inherently a male trait. Men have always competed with each other, but this is now projected onto women, who are expected to argue and fight for their place in the sun.

Men’s competitive nature is neither good nor bad, just a fact. It doesn't mean that women always get along or can't compete with each other, but it shouldn't be the norm. Bullying among girls starts in childhood. Our culture fosters the idea that female friendship or even just normal relationships don't exist. Instead of supporting each other, women gossip, hate, and sometimes even commit acts of cruelty against one another – why? Because they've been told they can't and shouldn't be friends if they want to be successful.

Does Female Friendship Exist?
Yes, it does. Some of my best friends have been women. I had a phase of "only male friends," but it passed quickly. Women understand each other's deepest emotions. Women can help in "female" situations. Women create a sisterhood that stands by you in any situation. This kind of relationship means that understanding our nature and psychology is inherent in our friends because they are like us. They can simply listen without immediately offering solutions.

A female friend can create comfort and peace even when there's turmoil inside. And no matter what happens, we know she'll be on our side.

However, this isn't a universal rule. Women can be friends with men, and men can be friends with women. That's also normal. Everyone chooses the friend they deem fit. It would be wrong to devalue your friendship with someone of a different gender. But we must also remember that female friendship does exist, and it's genuine and non-competitive.

What Are the Takeaways?
At the end of the film, Andy refuses to step over Emily. Whether they are friends or not, female tolerance and humanity triumph over empty ambitions. At work, in personal life, and even within families, women support each other. We must remember who we are and not let societal stereotypes dictate our thoughts about other women. True success lies in forging your own path against certain stereotypes.

Therefore:

Don't be afraid to build relationships with women at work.
Remember that openness and friendliness are not weaknesses but strengths.
Continue being yourself, forgetting all stereotypes.
Value your femininity.
Love yourself and those around you.